# The great LightSheet hoax!



## fubarcar (Jan 16, 2005)

*LightSheet and a lesson on how NOT to start your 1st post*

*THE FOLLOWING THREAD SHOULD BE TREATED AS B***S*** *   *(UNLESS OF COURSE YOU BELIEVE 'The Life Of Brian' WAS AN HISTORICALLY ACCURATE ACCOUNT) It should be made clear that Lightsheet is NOT a hoax but an actual product that is great for internal lighting of scale models, particularly Star Trek ships having warp nacelles in their construction. More information can be obtained here;*   [email protected] _fubarcar_

Hi guys,
My first post on the forum, which I have to say is a goldmine of information and refreshingly relaxed. Keep up the great work everyone!

I’ve been tempted back to the craft/art (hehe, you don’t get me that easy), following an absence of 31 years. The reason? Hopefully the soon to be released PL 1/350th Enterprise Refit/A, which incidentally I only became aware of through a single screenshot (2nd one down), on Thomas’s homepage, despite the casual browsing of many 1701A related sites, including HobbyTalk.

I wonder how many more (er, … mature) people, there are like me out there who don’t appreciate scale through lack of experience, but would return if a decent sized kit for the “Big E” appeared? You see, well… 1/350th meant nothing to me really, but “over 33 inches long” means a helluva lot (apparently, in the real world, size DOES matter!).

Anyway, I digress. Let’s move onto the cause of my post; LightSheet. It doesn’t exist! It is a fictitious temporal material that exists in the same realm as warp-drive, transporter technology and unicorn toenail clippings! Why do I make this statement? Well, if LightSheet did exist it would be for sale all over the ‘net in great abundance!

I’ve just spent the best part of a weekend banging my head on a wall searching for the stuff! All the links for it are either dead or lead back to the same places from where they originated. It doesn’t matter how I structure the search, all links produce the same results. Therefore, the only true conclusion I’ve come to is one of conspiracy. I’m convinced that someone has access to time-displacement equipment, saw my search for ‘LightSheet’ in the future, and went back in time to produce all these self-defeating links just to frustrate me!

They did leave one viable source however; [email protected]

But, I ain’t even goin’ there, ‘cos all I expect is a pre-recorded response that goes somethin’ like this;

“Hello Fubarcar, I’ve been expecting you. You will probably have concluded by now that all this ‘LightSheet’ related material has been created solely to have a good laugh at your expense. Well you’d be right, HAHAHAHAHAHA”.

There, you see, SEE! I told you, I TOLD YOU!

(_Oh dear. A drooling and hysterical Fubarcar is led away by two burly gentlemen who insisted he wear a strange white garment with very long sleeves and numerous buckles and straps sown into it. Is Fubarcar another LightSheet victim? We cannot say, but he will be remembered for having the shortest posting career on the HobbyTalk forum!_).


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## Young Offender (May 3, 2000)

Welcome!

http://www.beingseen.com/flatlite.html
http://www.beingseen.com/sheets.html


YO
:hat:


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## ArthurPendragon (Jan 4, 2004)

fubarcar said:


> Anyway, I digress. Let’s move onto the cause of my post; LightSheet (henceforth referred to as LIE Sheet!). It doesn’t exist! It is a fictitious temporal material that exists in the same realm as warp-drive, transporter technology and unicorn toenail clippings! Why do I make this statement? Well, if LieSheet did exist it would be for sale all over the ‘net in great abundance!
> [/I]).


Hmmmmm... "Lightsheet" is a simple "name" given by TrekFX for his products, which are NOT sold via internet (as long as I know).

In fact, you must search for ELECTROLUMINESCENT LIGHT, or EL light...

Then, you'll find a LOT of sites and companies, just like the one at the post above mine.


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## fubarcar (Jan 16, 2005)

Oops, I haven't started very well!

My sincere apologies Immediately to trekfx. I assumed that you were the sole producer of this type of material and it was unobtainable in any other guise. I also assumed, wrongly, that you were a large company (and therefore capable of absorbing my poor attempt at humour and disregarding my post). The word "LieSheet" should now be disregarded immediately and was made in poor taste.

Once again trekfx, my sincere apologies.

If anyone feels that this post should be removed, please say and it will be done forthwith.


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## tripdeer (Mar 7, 2004)

Hehehe, good to have you aboard, fubarcar. You have a singular wit!  Seriously, enjoy posting here! (Most) everyone is very friendly and welcoming! :thumbsup:

Dan


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## rossjr (Jun 25, 2001)

Dances pretty well too!


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## TrekFX (Apr 15, 2004)

What the heck is THIS all about?

Who did I offend and how so?

I will add that right now I am in a period of transition with the product line and still need to finalize details. I hope you can bear with me.

Mike Emery
LightSheet Systems


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## fubarcar (Jan 16, 2005)

Please try to ignore the thread TrekFX, it isn't worth your time. No offence was intended to any individual, and in all certainty, neither have you caused any. My apologies yet again that LightSheet or any reference to yourself appeared anywhere in this thread.

Good luck with the product line 

(This hole is getting deeper and I'm scared of the dark!).


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## Nova Designs (Oct 10, 2000)

Someone throw this guy a rope, he's going under!


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## Ignatz (Jun 20, 2000)

No rope goes down that far.


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## JGG1701 (Nov 9, 2004)

Here ya go !


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## StarshipClass (Aug 13, 2003)

For gosh sake, man! USE THE EDIT BUTTON! Destroy your words of abuse!


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## ken072359 (Aug 1, 2003)

TrekFX said:


> What the heck is THIS all about?
> 
> Who did I offend and how so?
> 
> ...



Don't worry Mike, the reasonable among us DO bear with you. And as a fool from the street over from me just confirmed (as HE was yelling at ME while he was blocking my street for 10 minutes waiting to pick someone up when there was plenty of room to pull over) a mouth warping out of orbit before the brain engages causes embarrassment to the owner. :wave:


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## fubarcar (Jan 16, 2005)

To ken;
Agreed :drunk:

To the Perfesser;
I feel that editing at this point is probably unwise (yeah, like my 1st post was sage material too! - not). What the eyes see, the mind does not forget.

I'd prefer to suffer some personal (and very public) embarrassment, rather than highten speculation about what transpired by deleting key parts of the above. The thread will (hopefully), serve as a lesson and reminder to both future members and myself on how not to conduct a first post.

Also, I feel that my unreserved apology to TrekFX should remain very public, so that observers understand that his reputation and products are absolutely not in question, whilst my approach to introducing myself and posting is somewhat down the pan.

To All;
I've made a serious gaffe but would like to move on. I really am an OK sorta guy with a deep respect for the vision and values of a future world as seen through the eyes of all that participated in the creation of Star Trek, from TOS through to Enterprise.

If you can forgive my transgression and er.. strange sense of humour, I would like to stay. Maybe one day in the future I can contribute tips n tricks myself (general chat might need some work though, based on previous history  )


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## TrekFX (Apr 15, 2004)

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...

I get it. It was all kind of a story of some kind!

I don't think he meant any harm... he didn't think I actually existed!

I assure you, the government seems to insist that I exist because every freakin' year they take money from me! Every April, like clockwork!

I guess I got a little skittish because he made that allusion to unicorn toenail clippings... little beknownst to the unknowing that that is the single KEY material used in the magic of LightSheet Brand Electroluminescent Lighting Film and Bar Association. What, you think we use fairy dust or some such nonsense?? The exact percentage by weight per ounce of baby oil is a closely-guarded secret, as is the exact number of babies required to produce each unit of baby oil.

Also, it is just a vicious rumour that if you hold a piece of LightSheet next to your head, you can look in the other ear and actually see it right through the brain. I don't understand how THAT one started.

It is also a favoured treat of maladjusted cats. Dogs don't seem to care for it.

Best regards,
Mike


DISCLAIMERS:

Do NOT feed Lightsheet or any other electrical device to cats.
Do NOT attempt to DIY baby oil.
Do NOT forget that Chick-fil-a makes excellent chicken sandwiches that do NOT contain unicorn toenail clippings nor fairy dust.
Do NOT forget to tip your server.

DO edit the first post with a header of some kind stating that it is a work of fiction!


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## ken072359 (Aug 1, 2003)

As suggested, I don't want to edit myself, so I'll quote me instead.



ken072359 said:


> a mouth warping out of orbit before the brain engages causes embarrassment to the owner. :wave:


We're all guilty of that, so we just do the best we can in damage control and go from there. :thumbsup:


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## Ignatz (Jun 20, 2000)

And there ain't no Santa Claus neither!


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## starmanmm (Mar 19, 2000)

> I guess I got a little skittish because he made that allusion to unicorn toenail clippings... little beknownst to the unknowing that that is the single KEY material used in the magic of LightSheet Brand Electroluminescent Lighting Film and *Bar *Association.


"Bar" where's the Bar Mike???:drunk: 

Where have you been hiding the Bar?

Damn modeling is dry work! Need to open that bar soon there Mike!! :devil:


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## Thom S. (Sep 28, 2004)

I came in after a day of being away trying to get my base system back up and running and what do I find? THIS.

If TrekFX hadn't posted, this thread would have read quite differently by now. Mike, I'm glad to see that you still have that great sense of humor!


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## Lloyd Collins (Sep 25, 2004)

Who ever thinks the internet is boring, should come here.

I think Thomas has learned to watch us more, to keep us out of trouble.


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## ken072359 (Aug 1, 2003)

Ignatz said:


> And there ain't no Santa Claus neither!



Oh *#@&%)@^ing great!! Next, you're going to try to say there's no Easter Bunny???


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## sbaxter at home (Feb 15, 2004)

Ignatz said:


> And there ain't no Santa Claus neither!


There is too. Those who think there isn't are simply have their names on the "Naughty" list with indelible ink. The rest of us get our goodies PLUS theirs!

Qapla'

SSB


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## Ignatz (Jun 20, 2000)

And of course there's an Easter Bunny. Wot a bunch o' maroons! He is of that rare species of egg-laying rodentia, _Oryctolagus Gallus. _He wears a grey top hat and brown frock coat. I seen pictahs!

If there was a Santa Claus, his sleigh would be covered in Lightsheet. And we know there's no such thing as that!


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## xr4sam (Dec 9, 1999)

Actually, LightSheet is real, this Fubarcar guy isn't...

Hey, Mike, we'll hold him for ya, if'n ya's wanna smack 'im around a bit...


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## TrekFX (Apr 15, 2004)

Oh heck, he was just havin' sum fun and OOPS!

Oh, wait. if we MUST have violence to feel vindicated, how's 'bout we have a public flogging with one of those "pool noodles?" You know, those things that look like x-tra long foam macaroni with a hormone problem!

Really, no harm done. Let's all have some fun. Life's too short with enough shit thrown around to not laugh a bit more...

LAUGH 'TIL YOU SNORT!! :hat:


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