# Please Read



## Da Queen (Mar 11, 2005)

Good Morning, Guys! I've been in contact with Hank over the weekend and he is doing as well as can be expected. He would like to take some time away from the BB for a while and has asked that Dave Metzner and I keep an eye on the place for him until he is up to dealing with all our shennanigans again. That being said, let's continue to hold him in our thoughts and prayers as we let him know that we can all play nicely together during this time.

However, sniffing CA does have it's drawbacks, one of those being "acting a fool." Since Dave and I can't be everywhere on these boards at once, if you see someone acting like a disrespectful idiot, please let us know via e-mail so we can deal with it. I'd like for Hank not to have to worry about the place and to just get some much needed rest.

Fair enough? I'm counting on y'all....Don't make me release the flinging monkeys, now.  


Hugs and Love,
Da Queen


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

Even though I'm locked out of the Control Room, I can still wear my Moderator's helmet!


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## beck (Oct 22, 2003)

oh no ! not The Helmet !!! next it'll be the tights and the purse . i tell ya the power will go straight to yer head . don't do it Hawg . 
i promise to be good Lisa .  
hb


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## Dave Hussey (Nov 20, 1998)

If you thought Yama was scary, wait til you see him in that helmet!

Holy model kit potential Batman - the Yama in Moderator's Helmet kit in 1/8 scale complete with diorama base and victim b-board poster in the hanging cage! :jest: 

I'll take two please!

Huzz


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

Ha! Fear the power of my helmet! Fear it!


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## JamesDFarrow (Sep 18, 1999)

Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men?

Only the Shadow knows!

Bruhahahahahahahahaah!

James (aka The Shadow) :devil:


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## Dave Hussey (Nov 20, 1998)

I hear that yer socks are pretty fearsome too. :drunk: 

Huzz :lol:


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

Don't worry, Lisa. I'll keep my eye on everybody with this special Moderator's Telescope!


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## Dave Hussey (Nov 20, 1998)

Ha!

Looks like something my little fella wanted me to buy him last week!!

Huzz


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

Sorry Huzz, but you must have a certified Moderator's license to use one.


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## Prince of Styrene II (Feb 28, 2000)

Dave Hussey said:


> Holy model kit potential Batman - the Yama in Moderator's Helmet kit in 1/8 scale complete with diorama base and victim b-board poster in the hanging cage!


Nah, you don't need a kit for that! Just mold up some accessories for the Yama's Hawg kit!


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## Da Queen (Mar 11, 2005)

Lordy. I can just see where this thread is headed....  

Lisa


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## Prince of Styrene II (Feb 28, 2000)

Whhaaaaaaat???


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## Dave Hussey (Nov 20, 1998)

Nooooooooo prrrrrrrroblem!

I'm sure my sister in law got her driver's license in a cereal box so I'll just check the Wheaties tomorrow morning for a Certified Moderator's License. Or (dare I dream?) an honest-to-gosh _Moderator's Telescope!!_ :lol: 
Huzz


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## Capt. Krik (May 26, 2001)

yamahog said:


> Don't worry, Lisa. I'll keep my eye on everybody with this special Moderator's Telescope!


OH NO! Not the dreaded MODERATOR'S TELESCOPE!! The horror, the horror.

Honest Mr. Hog we'll be good!


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## beeblebrox (Jul 30, 2003)

Everybody get out your Junior Moderator Secret Decoder Ring. This week's secret message is:

"!!!esactun a si gohamaY"

Good luck citizens! :thumbsup:


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## beck (Oct 22, 2003)

on my decoder ring that comes out to be , " be sure to drink your Ovaltine !!??! " . 
hb


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## Capt. Krik (May 26, 2001)

beck said:


> on my decoder ring that comes out to be , " be sure to drink your Ovaltine !!??! " .
> hb


Oh, that's a piece of junk you got there. Here, my decoder ring says.....hmmm, my ring says "Redrum, Redrum." I don't get it? That can't be right. The darn Framistat in my ring must be out of whack.


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## Lloyd Collins (Sep 25, 2004)

For some reason I am having EVIL thoughts! Because I am the Midnight Bomber that bombs at midnight! BURN,BABY,BURN. Ha!ha!

And now some messages from our new sponsors. If you suffer from heart burn, try Draino Plus Drain and Stomach Cleaner. 

If you suffer from life, try Testor's Nasal Inhaler. For that I don't care day, and other non sci-fi model problems.

Some how I think my train of thought got derailed. What were we talking about?


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## A Taylor (Jan 1, 1970)

Yama,
You will need to wear some other attire *WITH* the helmet - security cameras have been installed since your moderator days...


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## Da Queen (Mar 11, 2005)

God help us all. Well, just to be on the safe side and for insurance reasons...in case Yama has to fire off one of his security "devices", I've gone out and given the monkey bars a nice spiffy coat of Testors (in a lovely shade of midnight blue with a metalflake finish and sealed it all with Future) in case we need to send one of his targets off for some time out after being shot at. :freak: 

Now, for the more serious offenders....would someone please see if Big Daddy Dave would lend us his dungeon?? (He has a real dungeon in his basement...I've seen it.) Oh, and ask if the shackles are still available....

I think we're good to go! :thumbsup: 


Hugs!
Da Queen


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## Capt_L_Hogthrob (Apr 28, 2005)

Moderator helmets, Moderator telescopes, decoder rings, Midnight blue monkey bars with metal flake, and now dungons! Those I get! But what in the HECK is "Flinging monkeys"????? And just what would they be flinging?  :freak:


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## John P (Sep 1, 1999)

yamahog said:


> Don't worry, Lisa. I'll keep my eye on everybody with this special Moderator's Telescope!


 That's no telescope, that's a Zero-M Sonic Blaster! My favorite toy bazooka! You pumped it up and it fired a blast of air with a loud bang. Once when I fired it, a guy driving buy screached to a halt, got out and checked his tires! :lol:

Wish I still had it!


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## John P (Sep 1, 1999)

I'll back Yama's moderator helmet up with my Texaco Fire Chief helmet with working loud speaker (did my folks ever regret buying me that!), and the mighty power of my Johnny-Seven One Man Army!










And my Argyl socks!!!!!!!


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## the Dabbler (Feb 17, 2005)

OH MY GOD Lisa !! I'll be good !! 
Just the thought of Hawg in tights and purse scares the devilishness out of me !

And Big Daddy Dave has a dungeon in his cellar ?? Who knew he was so kinky ?? Hmmmm...?
The Demure and Docile Dabbler

( But of course in this time of stress, out of respect for the Hankster also )


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## irishtrek (Sep 17, 2005)

Where do you 2 guys get those images any way? They are way outdated.


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## Da Queen (Mar 11, 2005)

Captain H...you can probably look up "Flinging Monkeys" in Polarpaedia. Let us know if you can't find it. I'm sure one of the original BB gang would be happy to explain. Just as a teaser though...flinging monkeys don't fling anything. ;-)

And yes, Dabbler...Big Daddy Dave does indeed have a dungeon in his basement. (can you say that 6 times real fast?) It is way too cool! How do you think he controls all those kids of his??? Seriously...he actually turned his basement into a 1:1 model of The Forgotten Prisoner scene. The fun starts at the basement stairs and there is even the full sized skeleton in shackles. His attention to detail (cobwebs, lighting, paint job etc) is nothing short of remarkable! It's a jaw dropper for sure! Now...if he'd only use that talent and energy for world peace....


Hugs!
Lisa


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## John P (Sep 1, 1999)

irishtrek said:


> Where do you 2 guys get those images any way? They are way outdated.


 Can't speak for da Hawg, but mine is actually a picture of ME.


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## the Dabbler (Feb 17, 2005)

"The fun starts at the basement stairs and there is even the full sized skeleton in shackles."

So THAT'S what happened to Jimmy Hoffa ??


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## beck (Oct 22, 2003)

Hey Cappy Hog , hint to the monkey thing , think Wizard of Oz . 
i'm off to have a cave beer . 
hb


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## Prince of Styrene II (Feb 28, 2000)

the Dabbler said:


> So THAT'S what happened to Jimmy Hoffa ??


Or that guy who is _still _on vacation....


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

Speaking of the Control Room, here's a picture of the Moderator's Control Room, circa 1957. 










It's my understanding that The Hankster built most of this, himself.


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

And here's an image of the Moderator's Control Room, when me, Lisa, JG and the gang were supposed to move to China. "Polar Lights City" was supposed to have been built in 2011.










The virtual map on the wall gave us the location of all the board members and when they were on-line.


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

Sadly, one of the few areas of Polar Lights City that was actually built is our parking lot, shown here. The vehicle in the foreground was my car (a JL-11014). One of the cool things about living in Polar Lights City is that Tom Lowe supplied the vehicles for everyone.


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

Of course, Polar Lights City was a top-secret agenda item. Only certain members of Polar Lights and the modeling community even knew of the idea, much less knew that ground had actually been broken. It was to be a utopian ideal. Alas, what could have been...


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

Here's a picture I took of Tom Lowe on his way to China, leaving from our Polar Lights parking lot in Indiana.


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## Arronax (Apr 6, 1999)

a) Where does he get these pictures?

b) Where does he find the time to look for them?

and

c) Why are we reading this stuff?

Jim


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

Aerowax,
The photos are pictures that I took from when I was working at Polar Lights as Moderator, from other PL employees, from our numerous trips to China, or from declassified documents at Polar Lights, Int'l.


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## Da Queen (Mar 11, 2005)

Oh! My sides! My sides hurt from laughing so much!!! :tongue: You're killing me, Yama!!! Where is the name of all that is holy are you getting these pics? Sheese. I think I peed my pants.

While I'm tickled to pieces that you are back in rare form, you know we were all sworn to secrecy re that little piece of real estate in China! I was always hoping we could pull that deal back together one day. But who knows! Perhaps when Metzner hits the big time with his new model company, we can once again live large. I sure would like to get those company cars restored. Seeing that pic of them in the parking lot brought a tear to my eye....ahhh...the good ol days...

Hugs!
Lisa


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## Da Queen (Mar 11, 2005)

Just a little side bar here re that pic of the circa 1957 moderator control room....Yama my dear, you have no idea how close your caption is to the real deal. Some of you may remember that Hank and I are buds from high school. Well, I am here to testify that his bedroom was not too far off that picture! Hank was a ham radio junkie back then and he had all sorts of radio gizmos, dials, guages, wires, sparking thingies etc in there...and he sat by the hour gabbing geek speak with dudes half way around the world. See! It's in his blood.

You go, Hank! We love ya and hope you are doing well.

Hugs!
Lisa


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## Roy Kirchoff (Jan 1, 1970)

Here's an interesting shot of Yamahog and Hooty arguing about whether the floor in the Moderators Control Room should remain "shiny". Notice the hog incognito with glasses and the absence of his infamous mustache.











Unfortunately funds for the waxing and buffing crew dried up so Tom and committee decided to tear out the clubhouse carpet and install it instead.

Those lights you see on the big board to the right are the positions of the ships leaving China carrying all those PL kits into our greedy little hands.

RK


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## John P (Sep 1, 1999)

My car was MUCH cooler than Yama's. And I always managed to talk my sister into driving.


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## Steve244 (Jul 22, 2001)

yamahog said:


> Sadly, one of the few areas of Polar Lights City that was actually built is our parking lot, shown here. The vehicle in the foreground was my car (a JL-11014). One of the cool things about living in Polar Lights City is that Tom Lowe supplied the vehicles for everyone.


It may be pertinent the above jpg (chernobyl/prypiat/prypiat-amuse-bumper-cars-1.jpg) was taken close to Chernobyl. I think there is more to the story than yama is telling us.


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

*From the Archives*

Here's a pic of JG of PD in the pod that he leased from Tom Lowe. That's Jerry yelling at some of the neighbor kids to stay off his lawn. That JG was a card!









[declassified doc.--Beijing, China. April, 2000]


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## irishtrek (Sep 17, 2005)

Hey Yamahog, heck of a new toy you all got there. When you gonna give rides in her?


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## terryr (Feb 11, 2001)

A gurl here? No gurls allowed! They got Cooties!!!


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## Da Queen (Mar 11, 2005)

Oh yeah? Well, this "gurl" can knock your lights out, Bucko! :freak: 


:thumbsup: 
Da Queen


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## beeblebrox (Jul 30, 2003)

"You can't fight in here, this is the war room!"


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

*"Oh yeah? Well, this "gurl" can knock your lights out, Bucko!"* :freak: 

Heh, heh, heh. I was waiting for that, my Queen!


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## Trek Ace (Jul 8, 2001)

I think that Da Queen administering noogies are in order for that one! :lol:


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## Da Queen (Mar 11, 2005)

Yama, my sweet knight in shining armour...I just wanted to be sure that he knew his Queen was more than lavendar, lace and bling bling on her head. ;-)


Let them eat cake!
Da Queen


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## WarpCore Breach (Apr 27, 2005)

Instruct the knave in the error of his way, O gracious Queen! The Knights of the Polar Lights Table ought to take leave of the Oval Table to bring the malcreant to justice! :hat:


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## Prince of Styrene II (Feb 28, 2000)

Oo, _Ooo!!!_ I get to be third in the "Noogie Lineup"!!

Their noggin is always a bit sore by the third round! :devil:


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## Capt_L_Hogthrob (Apr 28, 2005)

terryr said:


> A gurl here? No gurls allowed! They got Cooties!!!




Ooooh, I see Flinging Monkey's in his future!.....Right Queen?!?

*whispers* Polarpedia comes in handy at times!


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## Da Queen (Mar 11, 2005)

Flinging Monkeys...Monkey Bars...Big Daddy Dave's dungeon...Oh Knight of the Warpcore Breach, what say you in Sir Yama's absence? Perhaps we should show a little mercy toward this lowly knave??? Would someone please bring forth the royal copy of the Polarpaedia so that we can see what precident he has set...if any. That may help us decide. I believe such offenses can be found on page 42,673, section 12.9877, paragraph 4. Would someone please read it for me...I seem to have misplaced my royal "readers."  

Da Queen


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## terryr (Feb 11, 2001)

Da Queen said:


> Oh yeah? Well, this "gurl" can knock your lights out, Bucko! :freak:
> 
> 
> :thumbsup:
> Da Queen


I've been physically threatened! Someone tell a Moderator!!


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## Prince of Styrene II (Feb 28, 2000)

terryr said:


> I've been physically threatened! Someone tell a Moderator!!


She *is* a moderator around here! Well, if only in spirit, as she was when it was still a PL board. _And here we honour tradition!!_ <strikes noble stance>



Da Queen said:


> Perhaps we should show a little mercy toward this lowly knave??? Would someone please bring forth the royal copy of the Polarpaedia so that we can see what precident he has set...if any. That may help us decide. I believe such offenses can be found on page 42,673, section 12.9877, paragraph 4. Would someone please read it for me...I seem to have misplaced my royal "readers."


Let me see... <flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip, flip> You know, this would go a whole lot faster if I didn't flip the pages one by one. _We need this thing on a website or somethin'!!!_ huh? Oh. hehehe. <ahem> <click, click, click, click, click, click, click>

*AH HA!!!* Here it is! It says we have to revert him back to a beanie, he has a time out on the Monkey Bars &...... pardon the hamster?


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## Lloyd Collins (Sep 25, 2004)

Insanity runs ramped around here. Somebody help me catch it!


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## irishtrek (Sep 17, 2005)

"If you have a problem and no one else can help and if you can find them then maybe you can hire the A-Team."


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## beeblebrox (Jul 30, 2003)

I had Jello today. It had fruit in it. :roll:


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## Da Queen (Mar 11, 2005)

Well, yes, he does have the right, one time and one time only, to play the "pardon the hamster" card. The question is...will he do it???

;-)


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## otto (Jan 1, 1970)

I say flog the knave!......Otto, .....we hav'nt had a good flogin fer quite a spell


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## Lloyd Collins (Sep 25, 2004)

I want a recount of the hanging chads!


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

Forget the pardon. I say he gets this:


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## irishtrek (Sep 17, 2005)

But what did he do to deserve such a cruel fate?


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## the Dabbler (Feb 17, 2005)

Just a little off the top sir ???


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## Prince of Styrene II (Feb 28, 2000)

beeblebrox said:


> I had Jello today. It had fruit in it.


*JELLO?!?!* Awwww, man!  



yamahog said:


> Forget the pardon. I say he gets this:


He gets a model kit?


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## Da Queen (Mar 11, 2005)

The quality of mercy is not strained, boyz. It falls like a gentle rain from heaven. ;-) Let's be nice and pardon the hamster lest we scare off the newbie from Portugal.

And....Andy...no more Jell-O for you....especially the red stuff. You know how you get when you eat the red stuff. :tongue: 

Hugs!
Lisa


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## irishtrek (Sep 17, 2005)

Who gets to go through the quckening?


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## yamahog (Nov 19, 1998)

*"He gets a model kit?"*

Prince,
Absolutely. After all, like Da Queen says, "it's not good quality to strain your mercy." Those of us who have read the Bard know that what Da Queen means is that...well...um, straining your mercy...is,...bad? 

--Hawg


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## the Dabbler (Feb 17, 2005)

I know I've had strains a couple times, and first thing I said was " OH, MERCY !!"
Well, OK, not exactly that, but sorta close !


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## MonsterModelMan (Dec 20, 2000)

And here is Yama as he was assembling the Knights of the PL Roundtable.

MMM


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## Prince of Styrene II (Feb 28, 2000)

I thought it was moreoval-ish???


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## MonsterModelMan (Dec 20, 2000)

If so, then one would be closer to the King instead of each being equal to one another.

It was the only PL Knights of the Round Table pic I could get...they keep them under wraps these days...secret society and all.....I'm surprised they didn't see the flash when the pic was taken.

MMM


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## the Dabbler (Feb 17, 2005)

Prince of Styrene II said:


> I thought it was moreoval-ish???


Did you mean more OAF-ish ?


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## WarpCore Breach (Apr 27, 2005)

Our Queen's Mercy is matched by her Wisdom and Grace.

As you bid, Oh Queen!  



Da Queen said:


> The quality of mercy is not strained, boyz. It falls like a gentle rain from heaven. ;-) Let's be nice and pardon the hamster lest we scare off the newbie from Portugal.
> 
> And....Andy...no more Jell-O for you....especially the red stuff. You know how you get when you eat the red stuff. :tongue:
> 
> ...


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## irishtrek (Sep 17, 2005)

Prince of Styrene II said:


> I thought it was moreoval-ish???


It's round not ovalish!!!


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## beeblebrox (Jul 30, 2003)

Ovaltine?


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## the Dabbler (Feb 17, 2005)

I LIKE OVALTINE ! Let's go to MY house, Mom's making RICH, CHOCOLATEY OVALTINE!


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## Lloyd Collins (Sep 25, 2004)

Right behind you! UUMMM!


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## El Gato (Jul 15, 2000)

irishtrek said:


> It's round not ovalish!!!


"Camelot!"

"CAMELOT!"

"It's only a model"


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## SteveR (Aug 7, 2005)

Jacques Plante didn't care whether we drank Ovaltine or not.


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## irishtrek (Sep 17, 2005)

Ovaltine? Whats wrong with Nestles? After all Nestlse makes the very best chocolate.


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## the Dabbler (Feb 17, 2005)

BUT, as my grandson called it, "Oiltine" has vitaminies & stuff ! And it's malted too, just like dem der old fashioned milkshakes. But no more decoder rings alas !!


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## Capt. Krik (May 26, 2001)

the Dabbler said:


> But no more decoder rings alas !!



Leapin' Lizards! If there's no decoder ring how are we ever going to know what Little Orphan Annie is trying to tell us!


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## MadCap Romanian (Oct 29, 2005)

Glad you guys have a sense of humor. Real refreshing!

A guy goes to view a new 300 story sky scraper. When he gets to the top of it, he walks over to the railing and looks over. 

A man in a grey suit walks up to him and says "Did you know that this building is so tall that when the wind blows, it hits the side of the building on the 20th story, curves upward, increases in velocity at the 70th story and by time it reaches the 300th story, it is so strong that if someone jumps off this railing, within 5 minutes he'll be returned to the top?"

The guy looks at him in disbelief and says "That can't be true!".

The man in the grey suit says "Sure it is! I'll prove it!". He then climbs over the railing and jumps off. 

Down he goes.....until he hits the 70th story, then sure enough, up he comes again! Five minutes pass and he's up on the railing again!

The guy says "This is too good to be true! I've got to try it!" So down he goes....down...down..down.right to the ground!

A little old lady, who was watching this the whole time, approaches the guy in the grey suit and says "You've got a really sick sense of humor, SUPERMAN!" :tongue:


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## Prince of Styrene II (Feb 28, 2000)

Da Queen said:


> The quality of mercy is not strained, boyz. It falls like a gentle rain from heaven. ;-) Let's be nice and pardon the hamster lest we scare off the newbie from Portugal.


Hey, at the very least, with this thread we showed him just how truly crazy we are! Sink or swim, ya' know!



Da Queen said:


> And....Andy...no more Jell-O for you....especially the red stuff. You know how you get when you eat the red stuff.


But Mum!!!! I like the red Jello! It's... red-ish! :roll: 



MonsterModelMan said:


> If so, then one would be closer to the King instead of each being equal to one another.


I was refering to _*our*_ table! I remember it being oval.




the Dabbler said:


> Did you mean more OAF-ish ?


Well, that goes without saying! :jest:


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## Heavens Eagle (Jun 30, 2003)

I am not sure about the table being oval I think it was offal.

And Da Queen is a wonderful lady unless you croxx her then you will find out where the term War Department comes from.


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## Heavens Eagle (Jun 30, 2003)

And HEY! What's wrong with Ovaltine?!?! I drink it for the VITAMINS!!! And no I don't think Vitameatavegamin is good for you too.


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