# OT:very bad news...



## XactoHazzard (May 20, 2003)

This is kinda personal but since you were a part of the good news... I just wanted to let all of you know that Jen and I lost the baby on Friday. Those who can and are willing to, we just need your thoughts and prayers in this hard time. That goes double for you Toby. I know we will get through it b/c we are strong in our marriage and our faith but every thought and prayer helps. Thanks in advance to anyone who keeps us in their thoughts.

Travis


----------



## iamweasel (Aug 14, 2000)

I'm very sorry to hear this, my prayers and best wishes go out to both of you.


----------



## Robert Hargrave (Dec 4, 2003)

Its very hard on the mind and the soul, when you get the news there is going to be a child in your lives. You start picturing the future, what they may look like and all the enjoyment you hope they will bring into your life, and that you'll give to theirs. Then they are taken away from you, it leaves you with this huge void of what ifs, and could have been. You and your wife, with the help of family and friends will get through this, it will not completely pass from your thoughts, but you will move on and cope and you lives will go on. I have been down this path that no one wants to walk a couple of times. You have mine and my wife Carols prayers


----------



## from_beyond (Nov 9, 2001)

Oh man, Travis . My heart goes out to Jen & you. You know youre on my prayer list bro. Its so hard to understand why things happen the way they do. Hang tough & take care of Jen. If you need anything, give me a shout. God bless.


----------



## kangg7 (Jun 21, 2000)

You are both in my thoughts and prayers.


----------



## Big Daddy Dave (Sep 30, 1999)

Travis and Jen, We will all keep you in our hearts and prayers this week. I am at a loss for words but I hope our prayers will help you both.


----------



## Dave Hussey (Nov 20, 1998)

Travis, I am so incredibly sorry to hear this. Words just fail me at a time like this. 

Huzz


----------



## sbaxter (Jan 8, 2002)

Words suck, and that's too bad because I'm fairly good with them. If only they had the power to fix things, or at least adequately convey our deeper feelings ...

You're in my prayers, and I'm deeply sorry for your loss.

Qapla'

SSB


----------



## KenNetzel (Mar 31, 1999)

My family extends it's deep sympathy's to yours. You are in our prayers.


----------



## Cappy D (Jun 19, 2004)

My thoughts and prayers are with you in this difficult time. My sincerest sympathies.

- Cappy


----------



## HARRY (Mar 23, 2000)

Your in our Prayers Travis.It's a hard thing to go through.My wife and I lost our baby 10 years or so ago.You question why but just keep in mind there was a reason the good Lord chose to take your child home.Take care of yourself and your wife.


----------



## John P (Sep 1, 1999)

Some friends of mine went thru this a dozen times over two years while trying to have a baby. Now they have 8-month-old twins.

Keep tryin' .


----------



## ChrisW (Jan 1, 1970)

God bless you. Be strong.


----------



## Ignatz (Jun 20, 2000)

I'm so sorry. We'll have you in our thoughts.


----------



## Jimmy B (Apr 19, 2000)

Travis - I'm very sorry to hear this. Peace, love & strength to you both.


----------



## Prince of Styrene II (Feb 28, 2000)

Xacto- I know exactly where you are right now, friend. Wendy & I lost our first one, too. It is a hard time, but know that all of us here are thinking of both of you. Draw strength from our thoughts & prayers.


----------



## cobywan (Oct 27, 2001)

Hang in there. It will get hard but you can survive this. It almost tore my marriage apart. (It was pretty devestating to my wife particularly.) This is one of the hardest things to get through as a couple. You can do it just take the time to heal.


----------



## The Batman (Mar 21, 2000)

I'm so sorry to hear this Travis. I pray that God will comfort you in this time of loss. My prayers and condolences are with you and yours.

- GJS


----------



## MonsterModelMan (Dec 20, 2000)

Travis,

Sorry to hear the bad news! My prayers are with you both! Take care and let God get you thru this!

Bob


----------



## XactoHazzard (May 20, 2003)

Thanks to you all for your thoughts, prayers and comments. You all have reached me here in my heart and I am happy to have such friends in those I have never met. Jen and I have been through alot together but never anything like this. We tried for over a year to get pregnant and we were so excited and scared at the same time. we've been together since we were 17 and here we are 29 and starting a family. It was so great and our prayers were answered but around Tuesday of last week Jen started spotting and it continued to get worse. We went to the doctor on Friday and they told us that the baby was measuring alittle over 5 weeks and the placenta was measuring about 7 weeks. We both new that she was already around 10 weeks and the doctor couldn't find a heart beat. We were devastated but we know we have each other and Jen knows that she is not alone. Our family and friends have totally been there and have made this alot easier then I thought it was going to be. But last night Jen physically miscarried and it was probably the worst thing I've ever had to go through and I know Jen was very upset and scared. I am certain that this all is for the best b/c the baby was not healthy and Jen's body knew that and stopped the growth at 5 weeks. We have already made our peace with it and have already stopped asking why. We are strong and we will get through this. Of coarse when February 21st rolls around we will take many moments to get through that time b/c that was the due date. We will name this child and always know that we have an angel of our own.
I love that baby so much and we have never met. 

Again thank you and I appreciate all the feedback.

Travis & Jen


----------



## ken072359 (Aug 1, 2003)

The prayers of many are with you.


----------



## StarshipClass (Aug 13, 2003)

Sorry to hear it. God's will be done. There will come a time for you soon to have a baby. I'll pray for y'all.


----------



## Steve244 (Jul 22, 2001)

Sorry for your loss, Travis...


----------



## lonfan (Feb 11, 2001)

Iam so sorry.


John


----------



## BATBOB (Jul 14, 2003)

Words cannot convey my sympathies. Take care of yourself and your wife...Bob


----------



## Geoff Boaz (Jan 1, 1970)

*So sorry to hear about your loss (text)*

My wife and I went through the same exact situation three times. I know how you feel. Also, please keep in mind that we as males deal with pain and emotions much differently than women, and while it was truly tragic what I (and you) felt, it was no where close to the despair the women feel. (witnessing it firsthand) 

So, what I'm saying I guess is make sure your wife gets plenty of attention, comfort and reassure her it was nothing she could control...it's something nature controls. Also, they (us too I realize) never get over it completely, but the pain does deminish over time. Be strong.

Again, my thoughts are with your family, and best regards.

Geoff

PS, we went on to have a boy and girl, so don't lose heart or stop trying.


----------



## Mitchellmania (Feb 14, 2002)

Travis- I'm so sorry to hear of your sad news. Know that I am praying for you
both! And know your little Saint is in the arms of our Lord.

Mitch


----------



## StarCruiser (Sep 28, 1999)

I can't even imagine what you are going through. Loosing a child has to be like loosing part of yourself...

I'll keep you in my prayers.


----------



## ham1963 (May 4, 2001)

Sorry for your loss I will keep you in my prayers.
God Bless


----------



## Rebel Rocker (Jan 26, 2000)

May God give you both strength and hope to see you through this tough time! Hang in there and know that you have a lot of friends here praying for you.

Wayne


----------



## dreamer (Jan 1, 1970)

Travis, Jen...words fail. You _are _both in my thoughts. Hang in there.


----------



## ClubTepes (Jul 31, 2002)

Thats just heart wrenching news dude.

Even though I don't really KNOW you, except through these boards, once I became a parent myself, anything I heard involving children really affected me in a much more personal way. I can't imagine what you're really going through right now. I'm sure its really hard on you and even more so on your wife. Hopefully you guys will try again. Good Luck.


----------



## phrankenstign (Nov 29, 1999)

I'm very sorry to learn the news....It's very sad indeed.

I hope Jen is okay and both of you get the strength to put this disappointment behind you.

I hope the future brings happier times for you.


----------



## pagni (Mar 20, 1999)

There is tomorrow...
God Bless you and yours.


----------



## Mark McGovern (Apr 25, 1999)

Travis,

As Club Tepes said, we haven't really met. But I've enjoyed our correspondence on the Board so we're not really strangers, either. I'm sorry to hear about your baby and I hope that my condolences will provide a little comfort for you and your wife.


----------



## John P (Sep 1, 1999)

My wife's mother had four miscarriages before she had two perfect daughters. (Well, Mary's sister can be pretty frickin' annoying, but I chalk that up to Mary dropping her on her head when she was 3 ). Things work out eventually.


----------



## TheNightSky (Feb 5, 2001)

My condolences....you are in my thoughts and prayers.....I'm sorry


----------



## FoxTrot (Jan 27, 2000)

Xacto, that is such sad news... I'm so sorry to hear about it. FT


----------



## Steve CultTVman Iverson (Jan 1, 1970)

Travis, sorry for your loss. My heart is out to you and your family.

Steve


----------



## XactoHazzard (May 20, 2003)

I thank you all again for your support. Jen and I are doing better but Sunday night was really tough. That was the night it all physically happened (Friday is when we found out.) Jen and I both sat down and read through ALL of your posts and she was very surprised at the support from people she never met. She appreciates everything you have shared and happy to know that we are not alone. We are strong and not once have we felt anger towards each other, we just hope that we do not as much trouble getting pregnant again.
To get through this we have decided to name the baby and plant a memorial for the baby. Again I thank you all for you kind words and taking some time out of your days to give me your reassurance.

God Bless you all,
Travis


----------



## Capt. Krik (May 26, 2001)

Travis, 
Really sorry to hear the news. I was really pulling for you and Jen. I know words can ease the sorrow the two of you must be feeling. Just wanted to let you know that you're both in my prayers.
George


----------



## Dr. Syn (May 29, 2003)

I'm very sorry to hear this. My wife and I have 2 great kids and they are the light of my life. But before the first one was ever born, we miscarried 2 times. It's a hard, hard thing to deal with and there are no answers. Be strong, lean on each other and don't give up. When the first one finally arrives, it will be worth all the hardship it took to get there.


----------



## scifibear2 (Oct 19, 2003)

*Sorry to hear...*

My mother had seven miscarriages before I was born. I am an only child. Still, at age 48, I think I have seven little brothers and sisters I will see someday. I am very sorry for your loss.

Dennis


----------



## Gray-headed Art (Aug 16, 2002)

Travis, 

My sincere sympathies to you! My now ex-wife and I tried for 18 years to have but one child, and experienced so many disappointments (probably the reason we have been ex-spouses since 1991). My advice, while the loss of even one pregnancy is terrible, unbelievably painful, most couples do achieve one that works, so keep on keeping on. I'm willing to bet that your efforts will be successful eventually. So, while of course, you grieve justifiably, keep on keeping on!

Art


----------



## razorwyre1 (Jan 28, 2004)

travis and jen,
my sincerest condolences. you'll both be in my thoughts


----------



## justinleighty (Jan 13, 2003)

Travis and Jen,

You're in my prayers. Just remember, "The LORD giveth and The LORD taketh away. Blessed be the Name of The LORD."

He blessed you with a long-awaited child for a time, and hopefully He'll bless you again. My wife and I have some very close friends who were about to go through fertility procedures when the husband (a youth pastor) had a dream and knew the procedure wasn't necessary. They conceived, but then lost the baby within a few weeks. They're still hoping and praying, though, and we're still praying for them. We'll be praying for you, too.


----------



## xr4sam (Dec 9, 1999)

Hang in there, Travis. That is a super-tough thing to survive, but keep the faith. Like John said, "It all will work out." Or something like that.

Don't look at it as trying to replace the baby you lost, but rather, think of all the fun you'll have trying again.

The memorial is a great idea. Mourn your lost child; DO NOT bottle things up. That is a sure recipe for disaster. Ask me, I am almost an expert on bottling things up, and their wonderful side-effects.

Peace to you both.

Sam


----------



## TRENDON (May 24, 2000)

XactoHazzard said:


> we just need your thoughts and prayers in this hard time.


You got it.
Try to stay strong.


----------



## normlbd (Nov 2, 2001)

You are both in my thoughts and prayers.


----------



## XactoHazzard (May 20, 2003)

Thank you all for everything... Jen and I had closure today to help with the healing process. We dug a 2 or 3 foot hole at my family plot and burried the remains of our baby. We put a medal of St John Neumann and A Miraculous Medal in the box. Blessed the remains and the medels with holy water. Said some prayers and read a poem to the child. We filled the hole and planted a plant at that spot. It was very hard to go through but it helped immensly. Thanks to you all again for your prayers and thoughts. I know I can count on you in my times of need. God Bless you all.

Travis


----------



## artic316 (Sep 12, 2000)

*sorry to hear*

sorry to hear the bad news.I pray that you can live through this event and look towards the future not in despair but with happiness.They say God works in mysterious ways.


----------

